What Do You Love?

What do you love?

We throw the word around a lot. "I love chocolate!" or "I love the beach". Of course there are people we love. And I don't mean "love" as in obligated to show and have concern for them, but I mean we just really LOVE to be with them. They just fit. We find ourselves completely relaxed around them. We look forward to being with them when we can and miss them when we can't. This is why I married my bride. When our relationship got to the point where it was time to fish or cut bait, I couldn't stand the thought of NOT being with her. After we were married, someone asked me about getting married and I said, "Oh, I had to."  At first they thought I meant "I HAD to" like with shotguns and all. But no. What I truly felt is that I had no choice. I had to. 

There are foods we love. Foods that just satisfy and the flavor is so good. A great steak. A superb cheeseburger. Chips and really great salsa. Franklin's BBQ. I mean, come on. FRANKLIN'S BBQ! When I was in high school I went on my first true backpacking trip into the mountains of Colorado. The whole bit:  backpacking in all our food, eating dehydrated food for a week. When we hiked down back to Durango, we all chatted about what we were going to eat when we got home. We were so hungry for real food. In Durango, we had dinner at a nice restaurant and I had chicken fried steak. To this day that was the BEST chicken fried steak I've ever had. I LOVED that steak. 

There are places we love. Whether it's the ocean or the mountains or the open road or the countryside or even the big city, there are places that bring either a serenity and peace or sometimes an excitement and energy that we just don't get anywhere else. I love exploring new cities. Finding neat restaurants, interesting hotels, fun shops, or learning interesting history of a place, all those things bring joy and adventure to me. I am fortunate in that I have gotten to travel some with my job and I always make it a point to find new places even in cities I visit often. 

The way all these things speak to our hearts is significant. It shows us a glimpse into the Kingdom that will come. The way all of these things thrill us is the way our hearts will be thrilled eternally when that time comes. I believe God gives us these glimpses so that we will latch onto them and use them as "anchors for our souls" (Heb. 6). They are meant to keep us from drifting and loosing our moorings. 

But there is another way these loves should speak to us. In James 4:5 there is a really interesting verse where the brother of Jesus writes: "do you think that the scripture says in vain, 'The Spirit dwelling in us desires to the point of envy?"  The Spirit desires? To the point of envy?  Really?  Do you see God as a God of deep desire?  Yes. Yes He is. And I mean DEEP desire. Deeper that wanting that steak coming off the mountain. Deeper than longing for that upcoming beach trip. And yes, deeper, much deeper, than you "desire" your spouse, or if your single, the desire you may have to have a spouse. It's a deep, longing, envious desire. And what is the object of His desire?

You. 

Naked and Unashamed II

It was all good. I'm mean really. All good. It's the only time in the history of mankind when a man and a woman could say that and it was actually true. It was a time of bliss. A time of total freedom and satisfaction. It was like one of those glorious times with the love of your life that you didn't want to ever end....except....it wasn't going to end!  It was meant to always be this way. 

But then, HE showed up. Like THAT guy that shows up at a roaring party and suddenly the party is over. Like the worst flu you've ever had. But in the summer. Like an all day rain when you were supposed to go to Six Flags. Like the worst canker sore ever. Like a Charley horse in the middle of the night. 

Oh he's much worse than all those things of course but he's like that because he's just oppressive. He just sucks all the wind out of you. But you can't seem to get away from him. But even still, there's something about him. Oh he's a big fat liar. But...that one part...what if he's right?  

"You know, I've been having so much fun and just enjoying life and this beautiful garden that I really hadn't even thought about it. But now that you mention it...", said the woman. And that's all it took. Just a tiny, itsy, bitsy, crack in trust. "I wonder if you're right? I wonder why He told us to not eat THAT fruit?  Oh how silly. We've got all we could possibly desire!  But still...What do you think?" she asked the man. 

The man was either watching ESPN or playing Word Scramble on his phone, but he just kinda shrugged his shoulders. It's not that he didn't care. Of course he cared. But perhaps he didn't realize the severe danger the two of them were in. He didn't realize, and didn't make the effort to find out, the seeds of doubt and distrust that had been planted in the woman. It was still all good as far as he was concerned. 

So now, not only was there that tree, not only was there that sneaky snake, now there is that man who seemed checked out. "Maybe I should go ask Father," she thought. But no, why ask Him? After all, He's the one that's been holding out on us. He's hiding something. It's really not fair. Why doesn't He trust us?  He's treating us like little children. I think that snake is right. We won't die. How silly. We are never going to die. "Come on man, come with me!  I have wonderful delights for you!"

And then it's done. 

"What's happening to us?!" the man says. "What have we done? I'm scared and I have this very strange feeling. We HAVE to hide, right now! Don't look at me like that!  Quick, cover yourself and I'll do the same."

The shame must have been unbearable. They had never felt it before. They had no idea it even existed. It's really impossible to imagine what it was like. The regret. The weeping. The confusion. And from this moment forward, mankind has been in the monumental battle to get back. It's inside all of us. We were created to be there, just as they were. Naked. Fully known. No secrets. No doubts. No shame. That's what we were made for. 

But we are not there, we are here. So we strive and wrestle and bend and contort our psyches to try to get back. But at the same time we are just like the man, scared and fighting an overwhelming feeling to hide. 

We have these two, seemingly opposed deep desires: To truly be known and to truly have no shame as a result. We want so badly to have relationships with people who will really know us and yet we are so afraid of what the result would be if that really happened. So we compensate with all kinds of dysfunctions. We take on addictions to numb the shame. We invent all kinds of personas to hide who we really are. We build huge walls around our esteem, man the parapets with canon and give orders to shoot at anyone that might get too close. "Defend the ego at all costs!," we cry. 

And as a result of our siege upon ourselves, we slowly starve. 

How do we break out?